watch out universe

Today's been a rather unfortunate day, not only for me but for those who got in my way and incurred the wrath of a tired, stressed out Cary. Before you think I'm completely evil, you must know that most of this stuff was completely unintentional.

First, I kicked one of these...

(I didn't really MEAN to kick it, it was in my way and I tried to shoo it with my foot and next thing I knew my foot had connected with the filthy, annoying little creature. The pigeon basically RAN into my foot, it wasn't my FAULT (heeee had it coming). But I still feel a bit bad, it's not very nice to go around kicking things IS it?!

Then , with my bicycle, I ran over the foot of one of these...

Now THIS I do feel rather horrid about, but the unruly little cretin ran out in front me, so really he ASKED for it. If he had been a good kid, and listened to his mom, it wouldn't have happened now WOULD it?

I carried on, on my war path, and rode my bike into one of these...

Except, well, it wasn't JUST one of those, it was one of THESE pushing one of those...

Yeah now THIS one I do really feel bad about, no sny comments or anything (she was walking kind of SLOW but I guess that wasn't her fault). I just nudged her zimmer frame, she didn't actually get hurt or anything. I'm the one that got hurt, I slammed on brakes and fell off to avoid going RIGHT into her, what a cost. But yes, poor little granny, she just got a bit of a fright.

I proceeded to drop a box of eggs on the floor, leave my wallet at the till and fall down the stairs.

It's been a SWELL day, it really, TRULY has. I think it's best for me, and the entire universe that I just call it a day and retire to my bedroom...

mah birthday

Despite the trauma that turning TWENTY FIVE brought with it, I had a remarkably good day. I woke up to the smell of fresh coffee and chocolate croissants, the captain knows me too well. I cycled to the train station and got the train to Nice where I met a friend for coffee and then went SHOPPING.

It started off with just a few tops and some pretty stationery and then it got worse and worse until I was in an absolute shopping frenzy; heart racing, palms sweating, money flying out of my purse and that horrible shopper's guilt that I'm all too familiar with, that guilty feeling you get in the pit of your stomach everytime you buy something... but none of that stopped me. I worked my way up to the fujifilm instax mini 7s polaroid camera and a couple boxes of film even though my plan was to buy it on ebay for half the price, I just couldn't wait. I was unstoppable. I walked into the Benefit makeup shop and I went a bit bananas, personally I blame the sales lady, she was just SO damn persuasive, even though she was speaking to me in French she still managed to sell me some very expensive foundation, mascara and eyeliner. Naughty French lady. I cycled home, cheekily took a few bottles of wine from the cellar and went over to the boat next to us to celebrate. We carried on drinking on our boat and then proceed to get on our bikes and CYCLE to Juan les Pins, in our state. I don't know if drinking and cycling is illegal, but I really think it should be. To say that I was a bit of a hazard is an understatement. We eventually got there (alive) and went to Pam Pam, that awesome, vibey Brazillian bar where they serve the ridiculously cool cocktails. I understand how peculiar this sounds but there's this Brazillian dancer there that I'm ABSOLUTELY intrigued by, in a completely non lezza way, she just has the most interesting and astonishingly beautiful face I've ever seen and she's SO good at dancing. Okay now that I've said that out loud it does kind of sound a bit strange, and borderline lezza, but I'm willing to live with that. ANYWAYS... we carried on cycling to Antibes where we met up with some friends, ended up falling asleep on top of a roof looking over all the boats with a hamburger in our hands... TOTAL success. We woke up, a bit dazed and confused, realised where we were, got on our bikes and made our way back to Golfe Juan, with a little pit stop in between to run onto the beach, get completely naked and jump into the sea. It was 4.30am and back onto our bikes, completely wet and sandy and a quick ride back to the boat. So, that was my 25th birthday. It's now Sunday and I have some post-birthday blues but I still have my little polaroid camera to play with and my chocolates to eat and my pretty flowers to look at. I have a crazy week ahead of me, the sailing charter starts on Wednesday and i'm starting to get a bit nervous. But, c'est la vie... come what may.

king of the bins

The port refuse area in Golfe Juan is a GREAT place (seriously), not only because you meet loads of yachties taking out their garbage too but because you FIND stuff. And I'm not just talking about smelly banana peels and old newspapers... I'm talking Magimix Nespresso M200s. Yeah. For real. Just like this. Sitting on top of the rubbish pile, caaaaan you believe it.

And... it totally WORKS. It just needed some anti-calc run through it. The lazy, wasteful creatures couldn't be bothered to clean the thing so they just threw it out. This is what these people are like in this industry, there's just SO much money being thrown around that something like this is just peanuts to them so the minute it stops working, for even a second, they throw it out. Which is completely RIDICULOUS but completely awesome for old bargain betty over here. Gotta LOVE a free coffee machine. If you have any interest in buying a magimix nespresso machine, email me: carymurdoch@yahoo.com. While the magimix is cool, especially cos it was FREE, if I was buying one I think I'd buy this starter kit that comes with a cute little machine, a whole lot of nespresso capsules, a carousel to store the capsules and some colourful espresso cups and saucers. Go look at my shop, you can buy it there.

Anyways, my little run to the refuse area was RATHER succesful. I went off the boat with a black bin bag filled with rubbish and walked back on with an almost new magimix coffee maker, the captain was WELL proud of me but asked kindly that I make sure nobody sees which boat I walked off of, you can't have your crew digging through the bins, it's just not the image you're going for.

New Names

I'm thinking that "completely cary" is a completely LAME name for my shop, especially for one with such epic proportions of AWESOMENESS. It was 4.30am in the morning and I'd just come up with my gem of an idea to make money out of my blog, I was overcome with excitement and couldn't stop researching stuff so I was a bit tired and just typed the first name I thought of and now that I'm not completely bleary eyed it's time to think of something a little less lame. SO, I need YOUR help, email me a clever name (carymurdoch@yahoo.com) and IIIIII... wiiiiilll... buy you a little summin' summin to say thank you and totally give you all the credit for it, I'll write an ode to the smarty pants who came up with my shop's name. And WHILE I'm changing my shop's name I'm thinking it's definitely time to change my entire blog's name, it was also a name I thought up when I first started with blogger and never thought I'd actually end up blogging and now that my blog is kind of famous and I'm going to be making millions with it, it's not really going to be aaaall about my life abroad anymore but rather something that will appeal to more people.

So... new blog name and new shop name is the order of the day. First one to email me is a rotten egg. Kidding, first one to email me is a GOLDEN egg, a winner in all senses of the word. So be a winner today and WIN something (maybe nothing, but mmmmaybe something, you just never know now do you).

My Online Shop - Completely Cary

Seeing as I spend so much time on my blog I guess it makes sense to try make a bit of moola out of it. So, I've started a little online shop, through Amazon, called Completely Cary where I'll sell stuff that's, well, competely Cary; recipe and travel books, quirky beauty products like Benefit and Soap & Glory as well other stuff I LOVE like kikois, cameras, silver jewellery and cool little gadgety things. It's completely in the beginning stages so there isn't much up but keep checking as there will be a LOT more coming.

At the top of the page there is a link to My Shop, for some reason it's not showing the entire page but I'll try sort that out. You could also click on "my online shop" link on the right hand side of the page and it'll take you straight there and open on a new page.

If you've done this before and you know how to monetize a blog, then email me and let me know, I'd really appreciate it: carymurdoch@yahoo.com.

So, go have look at my little shop and if there are any cool products that you think NEED to be there, then you can also email that to me.

Thanks guys

on turning TWENTY FIVE...

Now, I think turning 25 is going to be quite a traumatic experience. I mean, 25 is pretty OLD. It's the kind of age where people look at you and start thinking that maybe you should have a REAL job, and a husband and some children and a guinea pig and a casserole dish. ME, I have NONE of those but to be honest, right now, the casserole dish is the only thing out of that lot that I really want, and maybe the guinea pig but only if it's really small and cute and doesn't stink and travels well in a suitcase.

Anyways, yes, turning 25 is not going to be easy, so to console myself and ease the pain I have come up with a list of things that you can all buy me. Now, I've gone to a lot of trouble to ensure you know EXACTLY what I want and have put corresponding images of each item so as to make it easier for you, I'm just thoughtful like that...

So, number 1 on the list, is a scooter, a pale blue, vintage scooter. Just like this one. it doesn't even have to be a Vespa or anything...

But if you can only find a pink one then that will be okay too, I won't even be cross.

Number 2, a pink polaroid camera with lots of  extra film...

EXACTLY like this one (please). If you can't find that one, which I suspect might be the case then you can buy me this one... they're the latest out and very cute too...

These ones come with loads of accessories, like little leather albums and a special pen to write on the pictures and all sorts of cases and lenses and OOOOOOH I WANT iiiiiiiiiiiiiiit, please.

Uh, next. Number 3. I would like a horse, one that can give hugs , just like this one

I think's that all

WAIT, I've thought of something else...

I'd like a 3 year urrr gift voucher (?) to The Silwood School of Cookery in Cape Town or Le Cordon Bleu in Paris where I'd live somewhere like THIS

Okay, well, there you have it, my birthday wish list, if perhaps you feel I might be asking a bit much, then a beautiful bunch of flowers and a cupcake or a bonsai panda will be just fine.

28 July
That's when I turn 25. Just so you know. You still have six days.

30 seconds of bravery

Now that the owners have gone, I have quite a bit of free time and our lovely captain has said we could look for a bit of extra work on the side and a day later, just like magic, I found some work on a beautiful 24m sailing yacht going around Corsica and Sardinia. The only thing is, well, the position is as a chef. Yes that's right. A proper chef on a charter boat with 6 guests paying over a quarter of a million rand for a week. And they want to pay me as a proper chef too (2000 buckaroos a flipping day), never mind the tip we'll get at the end(5% each of the charter fee is standard, yeah do that maths). So REALLY, how could I turn this down? I'd have to be completeley NUTS to turn it down. I don't know where I got this idea that I was a chef, I really don't know. I just decided one day that I was going to tell people I was a chef and now it's kinda stuck and now that's just what I say I am. Hahahaha. I think it's time I looked into getting some proper training, maybe that's what i'll do when the season is over.

Anyways, I made it resoundingly clear to the captain that I was not a qualified chef and that my cooking is basic but he's friends with the deckhand on my boat so I think he's willing to let it slide.

Obviously I'm extremely nervous to be cooking 3 course meals for 6 very high end guests but I decided that it's a good thing to push myself and the worst that can happen is that I get to go on a sailing boat to Corsica and get bucketfuls of money, sure the guests might not be 100% happy with the level of cooking but they still have to pay me and they're still expected to leave 15% tip for the 3 of us. So really, worst case scenario is REALLY not bad.

So yeah, on the 1st August I'm getting on a train to Montpellier (5 hours away) and then getting on the yacht and doing a 36 hour crossing to Bonofacio, Corsica, where I will work, as a chef, and produce EXCELLENT, top quality 3 course meals, for 6 people, twice a day (aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah, trying not to panic).

So yes, that was my 30 seconds of bravery, picking up the phone and saying with complete confidence that I will be coming onto the boat to be their chef for a week.

J'adore Valbonne

I'm in LOVE with Valbonne, it's the most beautiful little village, it's just a little bit inland, far away from any boats or ports and such a nice change. I went with the captain to run some errands and ended up with a bit of time to spend in this beautiful place. Time wasn't the only thing I spent in Valbonne! I went to the English book shop and bought myself a recipe book, I wondered further down the street and sat down with a delicious nutella crepe and read it, I bought myself a few other treats and figured that it was almost my birthday, and I totally deserved it. I took a few pictures to show you...

J'adore Valbonne...

polishing and stuff

Polishing is NOT fun, especially when you have an entire kitchen to do.

Oooh look, just OODLES of fun

it's even more fun when you find...

celebrations

Now, because blogger hasn't been working, you've all been deprived of hearing my news for the last week, it's an absolute CRIME, my deepest apologies. So, here's the long and short of it. Long AND short? (strange thing to say, surely it's either short, or it's long). Anyways.

There have been many reasons to celebrate.

Number one, it was

which meant the most incredible firework displays all over the Cote D'Azur (I took that photo, oh yes I did, how pretty)

it also meant people marching around in strange looking outfits, singing songs and being VERY French.

On top of it being Bastille Day, it was Owner Leaving Day. Oh yes, it's RAMADAN. They've all left for Oman and news is... they're not coming back till next season. Oh how I will miss them so.

So, to celebrate all this excitement, I decided to make a celebratory jar of lemon curd (yeah no comment thanks), and a pavlova and a few litres of punch whilst dancing around the kitchen, in my apron (amongst other items of clothing, calm down), singing at the top of my voice. A few glasses of punch turned into a few too many, followed by a brilliant idea of mine to practice my cocktail making skills, you know, for next season, so I made a few cosmopolitans, a sex on the beach, a martini, a captain's cocktail (for the captain, you know, gotta make a cocktail for the captain) and a deckhand delight, for the delightful deckhand.

Well it was all fun and games till I was as pissed as a squirrel (cos squirrels get pissed??) and no one else was, great, good show Cary. I was then asked, oh ... WHAT'S FOR DINNER?

Oh hell, dinner... um... okay, yessss dinner. I forgot about dinner. Uh, I'll organise something. Well, it was not my finest culinary moment, I decided to make mozarella chicken with breadcrumbs (?), except the bread crumbs were more like bread balls, the mozarella melted out all over the tray and burnt and the chicken, well, it was like LEATHER, it was absolutely TERRIBLE. Oh and I served it with a salad comprised of ONLY lettuce leaves (?) and a ridiculously hot chilli sauce, just to spice the meal up, lordy lord.

Sorry captain, the chicken's not GREAT it it?

Not GREAT? Hahahaha. Yes Cary, it's not great, and neither is the salad.

Yeah, sorry about that, I'm a bit drunk.

A bit?

hahaha

ha

haha.

It's not funny, captain. You're drunk too, you're just pretending to be sober, I know what you're like.

Yes Cary.

Anyways, moving on. I though it a good idea to call my friend up and go to the local salsa dancing class on the beach. I was an excellent dancer, a complete natural, absolutely marvelous. Haha, NOT. I think I was a bit crap but it was okay, the gorgeous instructor took pity on me and danced with me and I felt like I was floating around the place, although that might have been the cocktails. We walked to Juan les Pins and found the most amazing Brazillian bar called Pam Pam where they serve cocktails that look like THIS

so naturally I had to order another one, just because it had a massive PARROT on the side of it.

Okay, enough for today.

bien dormir vous fous muets-muets têtes qui sentent comme Août et la sauce aux canneberges et des caniches français qui ont trop mangé chow mein

Dear Blogger...

Dear blogger.com,

Thanks for not working, for the past WEEK. I love that you won't let me add any pictures, or let me see what I'm actaully typing. It's fantastic, keep up the good work.

Love Cary

P.S you have made me really mad, really REALLY mad. Growl. Hiss. Smack. Yeah, watch out.

How to be an excellent cook/stew

First and foremost, you must be an excellent chef.

You have to know how to read stuff in French so you can follow cooking instructions and so you don't buy cottage cheese when you're trying to buy yoghurt you don't make quiche out of puff pastry cos you thought it was normal pastry cos you couldn't undertand what it said cos you DON'T SPEAK FRENCH. Anyways. Moving on.

You can't BURN stuff
Burning stuff is a big NO-NO, people don't seem to  take very kindly to it.
Oh, and you can't serve dodgey looking food, presentation is key.

You must know that cream, garlic and butter make everything taste better. This is important.

You have to know how to ride a bicycle, with 2 baguettes under your arm, balancing 8kg in your little basket with a steaming hot rotisserie chicken in your backpack, burning the living daylights out of your back. You've gotta be FAST so the ice cream doesn't melt and you have to do all this whilst adhering to the rules of the road, ringing your bell at pedestrians that get in your way, greeting the littleold lady in the boulangerie and watching out for wild, unruly teenagers on their scooters.

You have to be REALLY good at shopping. You've gotta be good at BUYING stuff, with someone elses money (tough one right?)

You have to know how to arrange

and how to make a really pretty

and you have to remember to check it EVERY day, or else the sneaky little plum at the bottom of the bowl will go rotten, and the owners wife will pick it up and go freaking

Yeah. BANANAS. Absolutely freaking, totally bananas.
PRETTINESS is the key word. You must be able to make everything look pretty, all the time, including yourself. Prettiness is imperitive.

You must be able to feed ridiculously, abnormally hungry men, we're talking an 8 on the hunger scale of 1 to Mole.

Anyways, as I was saying..

You must have one of THESE, a crystal ball

Very NB

This is a vital piece of equipment. You need one so you know how many people you'll be cooking for, what they would like to eat, what time they'll be arriving and how many nights they'll be staying on the boat. Without one of these, you're screwed.

More tips on how to be an excellent cook/stew to come...

making macarons

I couldn't possibly live in France without at least attempting  to make some macarons... so that's what I did today, look...

Ha ha, TRICKED you.

I never made those... mine weren't quite as pretty, but ONE day, mine will be even better than that. Making macarons is rather tricky, only really to be attempted by EXCELLENT chefs.

We're off to St Tropez again tomorrow and I think I might make a stop at the famous Ladurée macaron shop when we arrive, I think I remember the owners saying something about liking macarons, or something, I'm not sure, I better just get some anyway, just to be safe. Better safe than sorry.

Spoilt in St Tropez

So our trip to Italy was cancelled and moved to tomorrow and we went to St Tropez instead, except THIS time I got to get off the boat to "help" the boss' daughter with her children but really it was just to give me a break and let me see a bit of St Tropez, she's really nice like that. She completely spoilt me, I had ice cream, macarons, I got a beautiful scarf, a handmade note book and a couple of other things. I've never seen anyone shop like she did, in my LIFE, not ever. Anything she wanted, she bought, without even looking at the price tag, we went into all the designer shops, it was quite an experience.

Pretty Boats & Pretty Places

I'm all kinds of in love with this boat, it's just so pretty, LOOK...

News is... we're off to Italy today

Yalla Yalla

Surprise visit from the owners today, wanting to go on a little cruise and wanting some lunch from yours truly. Luckily we had everything ready for them and it wasn't too much of a disaster.  We had to yalla yalla (hurry hurry) but it all worked out okay. I thought 20 minutes notice was bad, but NO notice, sheesh that's something else. We really do have to be ready ALL the time. I whipped up something spectacular for them to eat and apparently I'm an EXCELLENT chef and Mr Farid would like me to come work at the Hyatt Hotel he owns in Oman, haha, how funny.

Anyways, that's me, driving the boat, taking pictures of myself, looking sprightly in my new uniform, being an excellent chef, multi-tasking, being awesome and at the same time looking quite ridiculous, you know, as you do.

Oh yes, we went to Saint Tropez the other night and there was the most incredible firework display at midnight, I was up waiting for the guests to come back from ashore so I ran to the front of the boat and sat right on the edge watching the display. It was a nice end to a rather stressful day.

It's now 4am and I'm not quite sure why I'm awake, we had a busy day again yesterday, had 10 people arrive with 15 minutes notice, had to make lunch for everyone and run around like crazy, we went to Ville Franche, Cap Ferrat, Monaco and Cannes and might be heading to Sanremo, Italy, later on today but that's not confirmed, I'm sure we'll get a call when they're in the car and five minutes away...

stew/cook/superwoman

Okay, 12 people are coming again, but they're bringing Mohammed.

Okay cool, so I shouldn't worry about lunch then?

Nope.

1 hour later.... 8 people arrive... NO Mohammed.

Mohammed where ARE you?! Mohammeeeeed, I thought we were FRIENDS?

Chilled. I can do this. Breathe.

Cary, we bought some quail for Mr Farid, (big boss) he'll have that for lunch.


Alright. Quail, shit, insanely small bird, how the HELL do I cook this bastard?!

Mr Farid walks on at 11.30am.

Hello, nice to meet you, something for breakfast please.

Yes, very nice to meet you too. Poached eggs? Great, won't be long.

RUSH to the kitchen. Oh hell. Okay, poached eggs, toast, mushrooms, tomatoes. BAM there's your breakfast.

Clean the kitchen. Serve drinks. Play hide and seek with the children, pretend to be thoroughly enjoying myself whilst doing so, smiling and laughing and thinking (in most evil manner) WHY DON'T YOU GO HIDE IN THE CUPBOARD... like, FOREVER. What a horrible thing to think. Anyways.

2 more guest: can we have some tuna sandwiches, and a salad please.


Yes, sure. Search like mad for tuna... eventually find it, serve sandwiches.

Thanks Cary, you're great. Can you get the children some ice cream please, Jude would like pink ice cream, thanks.

Shit, we only have white ice cream... Aaah, we have food colouring. Make ice cream pink. Miracle maker.

Mr Farid: I'll have a steak please, with some fries. Thank you.

But WHAT?! You just had breakfast?! Now you want steak? You're SUPPOSED to be having quail!! Damnit. Ooookay, shit do we even have steak? YES, yes we do, clever Cary for buying lots of emergency steak.

Serve steak, clean galley, remake beds for the 2nd time, clean bathrooms, help on deck. Refold towels. Make lunch for the crew. Clean the crew area. Serve drinks.

30 mins later... oh, Cary, could we have 3 more steaks please, they looked SO good.

Yes, of cooourse you can.

1 hour later... could we have a pizza please?

NOOOOOOOOOOOO! NO you cannot. You cannot have a pizza. This is not a restaurant! I have already made THREE different meals today,why can't you be NORMAL and all eat the same thing at the same time like NORMAL people. WHY? What's WRONG with you. Sorry, I mean yes, YES you may most certainly have a pizza.

Yeah, thanks Mohammed, jolly good show. Shot buddy. Consider yourself UNfriended.